The Stats and What They Mean for Us
Did you know that on average, 80% of our thoughts are negative, and, even worse, 90% of our thoughts about ourselves are negative? Would you believe me if I told you that we worry 1 to 8 hours a day? Are you surprised to hear that most heart attacks occur Sunday night due to worry about work? You all probably know this to be true from firsthand experience, as do I. The sad thing is, though, that only 8% of what we worry about actually happens. Negative thoughts eat up our time, energy, health and self-esteem spreading negativity to others. We must discover new ways of thinking and focus on hope and silver linings. Our lives and peace depend on it.
Silver Linings in Action
I will give you a real life example of how focusing on hope and finding silver linings in every situation, even the worst ones, can turn your life around. I had a coaching client who was worried about workplace changes that would soon leave him without a job. Loss of a job can trigger fear, or it can be an opportunity to reassess: Who am I now? What do I want now? What will bring me joy now? My client has shown himself to be capable of profound change. In just under three years, he has gone from living in his parent’s home and helping them pay their mortgage to living independently to sharing an apartment with his girlfriend; from parking cars at minimum wage to actualizing his childhood dream of selling cars; and from being home schooled in a socially and academically limiting environment to being comfortable with his coworkers, mentored by his boss and chosen to participate in a special training, which required him to attend a week-long class with a teacher, strangers, and homework for the first time in his life. He has even been exploring his creativity through writing, painting and playing guitar.
His self-confidence, self-esteem, aspirations, and understanding of his capabilities keep changing as he allows himself to explore his talents, skills, and desires. What could have been a terrible situation, ended up being the catalyst for him to change his life for the better in more areas than just one. Through this process of finding the silver lining, he was able to hear his inner wisdom and reaffirm his self-confidence, knowing that, as in the past, he will continue to create a better life for himself moving deeper into who he really is and what will truly bring him joy.
There is Always Hope
No matter what is going on in your life or in the world, you can always find something for which to be grateful. Happiness is the result of how we think about our circumstances and not what our circumstances are. When we focus on the negative, that’s all we see, and we miss the amazing things that are good in our lives. I’ve learned to notice what I wish were different but not dwell on it. I no longer get stuck in the pain and drama. Instead I keep my attention on the good things, the things that make me smile and bring me joy and hope. From that place of gratitude and happiness, it’s easy to bring in more of the same so that the good things keep multiplying. When something is especially challenging, I focus on what I am learning and how I am growing in wisdom, knowledge, strength, patience, compassion, empathy and/or love, including self-love. There is always something for which to be grateful.
This positive approach to life is especially important from now through the end of 2020. Since 2020 is a year of choice, what we choose now will affect us throughout the entire year.
If this message speaks to you and you would like to set a positive energy for 2020, click here to learn more. Remember to register to guarantee your spot at this special event.
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Dr. Paula, The Life Doctor, has helped hundreds of thousands of people improve their health, wealth and relationships through her writing, coaching, and speaking. Contact her today to get started on your journey. Recently Dr. Paula Joyce, PhD was chosen by Expertise as one of the 16 Best Life Coaches in Dallas.
Dr. Paula Joyce, The Life Doctor